Secret Stash 225

       Just like the Witcher was sucked into the dreamland of Toussaint, summer has hypnotized my mind as well. I had lost the way. If the end is justified than the means must be found. Despite the harsh winter, the merchants avoided Toussaint because they knew their minds with be boggled down and distracted. They could not allow themselves to be distracted from what really mattered: their trade. Thus, they waited at the edge of the pass to immediately leave when the time was right, or they made sure to find a way regardless of the danger. On the other hand, Geralt procrastinated and lost months of time, and it was by observing the merchants that Geralt finally left. For someone who did not read the Witcher series, this probably made no sense lol, but I really needed this. Timing was perfect. I goofed around then a whole month passed me by.... The formula to winning is in this poem by Berton Bradley If you want a thing bad enough To go out and fight for it, Work day ...

DO you GET DEJA VU WHEN SHES WITH YOU? Good song      Lately, I feel like my state of mind is not the same as the past few months. Drive and energy is different. Not necessarily without motivation, but I just feel different. Trust me, my health has been optimal. That summer sleep spoiling me hahahaha (i'll try to fix my sleep schedule, this might be the source).     Regardless of whether sleep is the cause, it still brings up the fact that our mental state is controlled by chemicals and neurotransmitters. Well being and motivation are controlled by dopamine and serotonin. Excitement and relaxation by norepinephrine and acetylcholine. Love can be associated with oxytocin. It goes on, plenty more chemicals I could name, but is that all we are?     Are we simply a result of the current chemicals in our brains? Do I not have any autonomy over my thoughts and state of being!? Are my joys and my sufferings just the changing tides of dopamine?    ...

 -Girei (Pain's Theme)- Summer slumping ... hehe; need to reevaluate  Tell me... What is it that you want most in life? What single wish would bring you the most happiness? WHAT DRIVES you every morning? WHAT IS ULTIMATE DESTINATION of YOUR LIFE? ... I want to manifest the perfect version of my self, an eternal journey of self-improvement. I want to live a life knowing that I gave my BEST at every opportunity. My wish is that I have the strength to never give up. The final destination ? There is none. One can always find ways to improve. Yet, the real question is why? Why does it matter to you? Improve at what? FOR WHAT? (future me, I hope you figured this sht out. I am writing my PS and I'm confused right now.)