Apes

My return to the country has weakened me. I gave into the ways of comfort and grew lazy. The days went by in a blur. We hooped for 3 days straight and got some good lifts in afterwards. I completed a couple technical tasks and errands required for the coming semester, but the main meat of my time was spent bummin. My will power broke slowly but surely. Each day, I would wake around noon and spend hours scrolling the phone and watching Netflix. How fkin pathetic... it doesn't matter if we're on winter break or not; a man without discipline is no different than an ape.

I have returned to the city to tie up loose ends and prepare for the coming journey. Here, I shall detox my dopamine and rehab my knee. While on the drive, I learned from Andrew Huberman the importance of catecholamines. They are the source of energy recovered by sleep (so the zzz's do have a purpose), and we can run on catecholamines for days when caloric energy is insufficient. That's why we feel energized after a good workout or taking a cold shower. Winning also releases these neurotransmitters to energize us. Digesting food utilizes the energy from these neurotransmitters as well; hence, the reason we feel decreased alertness after a big meal. I will learn to maximize this pool of energy for the coming months. For now, I will abstain from all sources of dopamine.

Figure 20. The endless, internal war of attrition between man and his inner ape.